Becoming Mo

I love my circle.

The community I find myself in right now, I’m truly loving it.

For a while, I lived with two separate worlds.

There was family: in-laws, nieces, the people tied to me by name and history.

And then there were friends: mostly my partner’s friends who slowly became mine.

Slowly… because the journey went something like this:

We don’t like them → Let’s give them the benefit of doubt → They’re not so bad → I think I want them around.

I kept these two parts of my life apart for a long time.

Not because anything was wrong, but because I was unsure.

Would my family approve of my choice of friends?

Would my friends like my family?

Would someone feel the other wasn’t “bougie” enough?

Too many whispers.

Too many opinions planted in my ear.

I didn’t believe them-at least not consciously.

But like all whispers, they settled quietly somewhere in my subconscious.

Just like the lies the devil tells us.

What we listen to matters.

We absorb so much daily-necessary and unnecessary.

If we’re not careful, we let it shape us.

We need to filter.

We need to renew our minds. Daily like the Bible says.

Well… I know I do.

The thought of having all my favorite people in one place felt… big. Overwhelming.

Eventually, I learned something freeing:

It was never my job to manage how people feel about each other.

My job was simply to be me.

Make introductions.

Step back.

Move on.

Not everyone has to be friends.

I’m not even friends with myself or my partner sometimes, so why the pressure?

Over the weekend, those two worlds finally met.

And it felt like one big family reunion.

I loved it.

Someone asked, “Is she your friend?”

And I said yes… and moved on.

I was proud of me.

I didn’t try to decipher whether the question was genuine.

I didn’t over-explain.

What each person feels about the other – later, in the comfort of their own home – that’s their cup of tea.

But the event over the weekend?

Awesome.

I felt bliss.

In my circle, I have the down-to-earth ones, the bougie highnesses, the clowns, the story tellers, the planners, business moguls, foodies, generally, friendly and not so friendly, and many more.

And somehow, they blended.

There was laughter.

There was noise.

It felt like home.

The year is just beginning, and I feel positive vibes around me.

Yes, there are shadows here and there, but I’m seeing and choosing light.

“Guard your heart above all else, for it determines the course of your life.”
‭‭Proverbs‬ ‭4‬:‭23‬ ‭NLT‬‬
https://bible.com/bible/116/pro.4.23.NLT

Maybe growth isn’t about curating the perfect circle.

Maybe it’s about trusting who you are becoming – and letting people meet you there.

I’m learning that peace comes when I stop trying to control outcomes and start surrendering perceptions.

When I choose truth over whispers…when I choose.