Becoming Mo

“…if only people truly knew you.”

I heard that sentence once, and it made me pause.

Not upset.

Not angry.

Not defensive.

Just… paused.

I know I’m sweet and kind and all kinds of beautiful. I also know – if I’m being honest – that I have mean streaks. They’re not always visible. They’re not easily triggered. But they exist. And that moment made me stop and reflect on them.

We are often very critical of the people in our lives – especially those we feel aren’t showing up, performing, or doing things the way we expect. We say we’re helping. We say we’re guiding. We call it constructive criticism.

But is that really what’s needed?

Is that what they need?

And more importantly… is our approach actually working?

Sometimes, the wisest thing we can do is pause and reassess.

Are we seeing this situation only from our point of view?

Have we truly tried to see it from theirs?

Are we sure we’re not part of the problem – or, in some cases, the whole problem?

It’s easy to see the log in someone else’s eye. Much harder to see the one in ours, even when it’s screaming for attention.

“Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye?”
‭‭Matthew‬ ‭7‬:‭3‬ ‭NIV‬‬
https://bible.com/bible/111/mat.7.3.NIV

The uncomfortable truth is this: our mean streaks are not always intentional. Many times, they’re triggered unconsciously. And the version of us that still believes we’re “doing our best” or “being reasonable” doesn’t always notice when we’ve crossed a line.

That’s why constant self-checking matters.

I like to think I’m close to perfect, but every now and then I say something or react a certain way, and my shocked self looks at my so-called perfect self and goes, “Girrrrl… what was that?”

…Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry,”
‭‭James‬ ‭1‬:‭19‬

The reality is simple: we are not perfect. None of us are.

So maybe wisdom looks like this: being slower to accuse, slower to correct, slower to cast stones. Maybe it looks like humility. Like reflection. Like asking hard questions of ourselves before pointing fingers at others.

And with God’s help, maybe we learn to handle conflict not from a place of superiority, but from a place of honesty – aware that while we may not be the problem all the time, sometimes, we contribute directly… or quietly… to what we’re complaining about.

Before we point the finger, may we first look inward.